mY SeCreT CoNFesSiOnS. . .

Have never felt so lonely in my life until a few minutes ago. i was about sleep but suddenly all the emptiness hit me like it was an antimatter. i felt something is mising but not empty. this time everything is missing. as if im floating in the air and jus waiting for me to slam hard on the concrete floor due to the sudden pull of gravity.

10days ago my friend got married. i just watched and something unfolded in front me. i cant imagine who i should spend my life with. seeing my friend get married taught me that love conquers everything even the darkest qualities of your partner. i am not saying that my friend and his wife has a very dark secret but the acceptance they have given to each other is quite magical. for 9 years they have stayed together before they said their "i do"s. it felt like just a formalization of eternal happiness for them.

loving someone for me is not hard. it is quite a mystery of what i really am. i can somehow conclude that i am the fusion of what i was brought up to be and who i want to be. it is difficult for me to stay insane because two conscience is telling me what to do.

2005 christmas, another one more bad christmas for me!! aside from god and my buddies, i got no one to share my christmas. haiz…i had expect too much im not blaming anyone because this is what god planned and i accept it. it has been a very  evenful year (2005) so many things had happen both good and bad….all the best in yr06

you may see me smile but im….

ChEeRz_FaNcY_FraNn

I’d love to go back to when we played as kids~ but things changed, and that’s the way it is….

I was listening to that song earlier on my bros Mp3 when i realise that i miss my family! i love the song because i use to sing/rap this song in the car like all the time ages ago! hehe. putting songs as loud as we can and just sing and have fun!i was talking to bro kee, meng & loon on the phone earlier just saying ‘hi’ and it just hit me that i miss them so dearly. hehe…happy birthday my beloved DD & MM hehehe….:p

before i go, just wanna say thanks to everyone who had been staying with me and cheering me up through good and bad times. Muakcz!!

-FaNcy_FraNn-